Wednesday, April 19, 2006

that what i cant grasp
you know this flatmate of mine,shes 18,kept telling me how she loved this guy and all from school,whom she missed on the freak summer day it rained, just like she could have used some pakoda and tea. I dont blame her ,i have felt a little lonely myself on certain rainy says....as if the symptoms of emptiness choose such a fine day to brood over things.and over the conversation I happened to remark "this isn't love you know".so what is it?'"its infatuation".Two days later she comes and asks me what that inf...tion word was, n i told her.....so after yet another day she asked me what i thought love was.Well ,i did make that remark with such finality, anyone could've been tempted to ask that.And there was this attempt, where words were somehow to lead me to the meaning ,ironic!!!! but thats what i seem to be doing....trying to grasp meaning through words. It has worked you know....like verbalizing a thought process after a little stumbling and fumbling does lead to some kindda clarity.but this once Im really lost. so i try to look at a certain relationship, the only real reference i have , n then the words. n it feels so lame......any kind of "explanation" feels lame .And shouldn't it be extrodinary ..the definition...that should make one go wow!!!...again only words.The more i try to define it, the further lost i begin to feel coz i seem to be moving away from what it really is.so what is it really.huh!!I hate to admit this to myself .....our lives are devoid of this thing we try so desperately to grasp.Something tells me its far outta the reach of words.yet its only words that are trying to grasp .......it and i'm 99% words.

1 Comments:

At 9:49 AM, Blogger Saurabh said...

once upon a time there was an animal. It used to kill, eat the kill, sleep and that was all. But this animal began to form and retain images of this simplistic actions he carried out. It developed memory. Often it wud find its stored info coming to its rescue supporting survival. Then gradually it gained control over what to retrieve and when. It got sublimer and subtler with each passing day and after a million years it realised it had what it chose to call "words" It lost not a second to term "word" as its greatest tool to CONTROL its environment.

After another million years a prominent member of the species suddendly declared in a public meeting in 1929 that it is not we who control the word but it is precisely the opposite.

I have heard that a few members of the same species are now taking this relevation to 1,022,863,307 members of the species thru the internet.

This cud be the real The Holy Grail...




The

 

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